Recent news stories have covered the ease at which anyone can download blueprints for a gun and print it out on a cheap 3D printer. These guns actually work and fire multiple shots. Of course they are somewhat limited and the technology is in the very early stages. But as with everything, technology advances ever forward. This got me thinking about where this is headed. What will you be able to print in the future? Let’s take it to the next level. Here are the five weapons that I would like to print off.
Mmmm. Redheads. You gotta love it when the suit matches the drapes.
Iron Man Suit
Sure it’ll be a bitch to put together, but I can follow directions, right? It only took me what, about six hours, and a smashed finger, to put together the entertainment center in my living room. Who cares about all of the left over screws and other parts, they’re just extra right?
But really though, an Iron Man suit would be awesome to have, flying all over the world fighting crime and terrorists. Plus chicks dig a man in a suit. And for the ladies, I’m sure the blueprint would come with some adjustments to make an eye catching Iron Woman suit. Nanomesh pushup bra included.
Beams comes in yellow and dark side red. Some assembly required.
Light Saber
Any weapons list is not complete without a Star Wars light saber. There really is no better close range weapon than the light saber and that includes adamantium claws, and all of the ninja swords combined. Although it is debatable as to who would win a fight between Wolverine and a skilled Jedi master.
You won’t have to worry about your light saber getting stuck in trees either, giving your enemy a chance to strike back at you while you feebly try to pull it out. No, these babies cut through steel like butter and make quick work of zombie heads.
Don’t forget to print the cyclotron. And don’t cross the beams!
Proton Pack
Okay, I’m going old school on this one. Think back to Ghostbusters. A proton pack is generally not a super practical weapon against anything but ghosts. But with all the paranormal activity of late, ghosts and ghouls and such roaming around, wouldn’t it be cool to be able to trap these?
However, I don’t know if your long deceased grandmother would want to be trapped in the stream just so you could find out her secret spaghetti sauce recipe. But you would be able to snatch up those creepers, like the evil child Samara from The Ring, before she gets you.
Nanobots make great pets!
Self Replicating Nanobots
Just one of these will do. It’s kinda like your first wish to the Genie in the Bottle – more wishes. Nanobots have many uses as well, not just as weapons to destroy the buildings and monuments of evil empires, a la GI Joe and the Eiffel Tower. You can also send them out to cut your grass and clean up yard debris. Or with the right programming they can even put an addition onto your house. Just don’t let them get out of control, or God forbid develop self awareness.
For more nanobots, check out my novel Extermination Day
Set phasers to… Mess that mutha up!
Star Trek Phaser
I had to put this at number one. The Star Trek phaser (from the TV shows) has to be the most versatile weapon imaginable. It has the stun setting, which means it can be used like a taser to take down the young Oliver Twist like pickpocket who’s just lost his way.
Then it has the max setting which can vaporize the tanks of an invading army. That makes it a real game changer for a small rebel group fighting an oppressive regime. Plus it comes with a handy bonus setting where it overloads and turns into a devastating bomb.
A word of caution, if you’re working with a team and they ask you to go on an away mission with your new printed phaser, refuse.
What weapon would you like to print? Let us know in the comments below.
